I felt a light tap on my shoulder as I sensed someone approaching from behind.
"Good evening Mr. Lanier. You are Christopher Lanier right?"
"Yes, that's me."
"Well we know it's a special day for you...actually, we're a little early, but we wanted to wish you a happy birthday and give you a small gift!"
Ned beamed a generous smile and slowly offered a blue United bag complete with a bow and full of snacks from the galley with a card peeking from the top.
"Thank you so much, that's so very kind of you!," I blushed.
I was dumbfounded; casting a thousand yard stare straight through the snack bag in my lap and surely perplexing anyone that was watching me after the gift drop at seat 3B. I couldn't believe it! In a flight with over a hundred people on board the crew took the time to give me a card, gift, and very personal happy birthday!
I opened the card; disbelief encroached. Captain Price, First Officer Lance, and Cabin Attendants Ned, Suzanne, and Megan had all written happy birthday notes. I was more than just surprised. To be honest, my eyes got a little glassy. I'm sure it was just the dry air. It was touching to me that in the process of getting so many safely from Fort Lauderdale to Denver, the entire crew carved out the time to make me feel special.
I have many friends that fly for United. I was talking to my friend Geoff Junt and he told me he's signed plenty of cards. I made sure he knew that I thought it was super cool and thanked him for it. I am not naive. Recognizing and making your customers feel special is a pretty good way to keep them coming back. I'm also guessing that other airlines have the same practice. After all, they know when the birthdays are and where folks will be sitting. That being said, I am also not a cynic. The time spent personalizing that card wasn't lost on me, especially in the context of preparations the crews are normally making to safely conduct the flight. The words of a wise leader come to mind. You might not remember a lot about a company or person, but you'll remember how they made you feel. That day United and that crew made me feel pretty special.
Last week when we lost so many souls to the accident at Reagan National I thought a lot more about my birthday card. I use it as a bookmark now, so I see if often. I thought about all the families that lost loved ones and the pain that they are feeling. I thought about the crew and passengers lost and wondered if any of them had given or received a birthday card that day. Did they experience any special moments of kindness before we lost them?
And then I did a bit of social media scrolling the next day. I saw many tributes. I saw kind and helpful words. I saw things that draw people together in a time of mourning and loss; comforting words, healing words. I also saw ugly and hurtful things; things that tear people apart. I guess that passes for normal these days. It's not how I'd like it to be. But that's how it is.
But it doesn't have to be.
Getting an unexpectedly pleasant surprise on my birthday prodded me to think deeply. How can I affect others like that? How can I make things within my sphere of influence a little bit better? How can I bring joy and happiness to others? When you get little doses of joy like that you can't help but want others to experience it.
So that's my aspiration; to be deliberately kind. I'll need to work on thinking ahead a little more. Maybe work on being a little less focused on my own needs because that shrinks the space for others. And although I disagree with many people on things that affect the direction and leadership of our country, there's not a reason to be ugly or rude to them. Civility of discourse is a gift of kindness that costs nothing.
So to the crew of United Airlines Flight 1729 thank you! May your kindness ripple to those in my community. Because even if you didn't personally know the passenger in seat 3B, your act of kindness meant the world to him.
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